She's here, and she's amazing.

It's been a whole week, and I've pretty much done nothing except stare at this baby. I figured it was time to update here and bring my blog to a close now that my pregnancy is over. I'm going to be fairly detailed - since I've overshared from the beginning (here's the first blog entry), I might as well finish with all the gory details.

In my last post, I mentioned that my doctor had suggested an induction to see if I could deliver vaginally with a c-section as a backup if our fears of a big bleed were realized. I was scheduled to go in on Monday, January 16th for my induction.

Sunday, the 15th, I got a call from my doctor in the evening saying that she had received a call at home that afternoon from the perinatologist saying that he had neglected to tell her previously that my baby had been breech at my last ultrasound. She told me that she couldn't induce when we knew the baby was breech, so I could come in as planned, but we would have to do another ultrasound to see if the baby had turned. If she was head-down, we would go ahead with the induction, but if she was still breech, I could either go ahead and have a c-section, or if I was determined to try a vaginal delivery, I could check back into the hospital and be monitored regularly and her position checked every day. When she did turn head-down, we could induce at that time.

I was worried. I didn't want to check back into the hospital indefinitely. I spent most of Sunday night praying and talking to my baby, telling her to turn head down so I could meet her. When we arrived at the hospital, my doctor did a quick ultrasound check and found that she had indeed turned head-down. I was so relieved that we could go ahead with the plan.

We did go ahead, and I had confidence that everything would go smoothly and that even if it took a couple of days, my baby would be born vaginally, and I would be able to avoid a c-section. All along my perinatologist had told me that he was afraid that when my cervix began to dilate, that it would bring on a heavy bleed. He didn't KNOW it would happen, and said it could go the other way - the part of the placenta covering the cervix could simply shift with the cervix, move out of the way, and not pose a problem. We were gambling that the bleed wouldn't happen and that my cervix would dilate with no complications.

It didn't happen. My doctor inserted the Foley bulb (a thin rubber catheter that is inserted into the cervix and then filled with water - it's supposed to gradually dilate the cervix). Almost immediately I started bleeding heavily. Heavily enough to scare Ed, who was beside me holding my hand while I had the procedure done. I got a little freaked out just watching his face, and I was kind of glad my big belly was blocking my view of what was happening.

My doctor said there was no way that I could continue bleeding at that rate. She had to take out the Foley bulb. Even though she removed it, I continued to bleed. Turns out I did need a c-section. I was really surprised, and I don't mind admitting I was pretty scared. I guess I just expected that everything would turn out the way I wanted, and when it didn't, I wasn't sure how to react. I didn't have a lot of time to react, anyway. I was being prepped for surgery within just a few minutes.

All throughout this pregnancy, a couple of smart ladies have been telling me that in the end, I would have the birth I needed. I think it's true. It was really hard for me to let go of my desire for an all-natural childbirth with this pregnancy. I was holding on to it pretty tightly, and when it became obvious that it wasn't going to happen, I was upset. But one of the biggest reasons that I wanted a natural childbirth is that I was scared to death of a c-section. Really scared.

I was afraid of ending up with a cesarean that wasn't actually necessary, but even an obviously necessary one was terrifying to me. I know it seems a little silly -  women go through it all the time, and so many of my friends have had the same surgery and repeatedly reassured me that it isn't the end of the world. I'm not sure why I was so scared, but there it was. I had the surgery. It wasn't fun. I don't want to do it again, and I hope I don't have to. But I lived. And it wasn't even the most horrible thing I can imagine.

So at 11:10am, my sweet baby girl was born. She was 7lbs 6.5oz, and 20.5" long. We waited a day or so to decide on her name, because we wanted to meet her first and decide whether our choice fit her. But we eventually named her Meredith Joy. Here she is in Eddie's arms about ten minutes after she was born:

One of the things I was most happy about with Meredith's birth is that no one tried to take her away from me (if I've told you the story of Nick's birth, you know why this was such a concern for me). She was healthy and strong when she was born, with no reason to need special medical attention in the nursery, and she stayed in Eddie's arms until the doctor finished working on me, and then we moved back into our labor and delivery room for a couple of hours where I was able to hold her and nurse her and marvel over her to my heart's content. Here we are during that time:

Eventually we were transferred to our postpartum room, where Eddie, Meredith, and I stayed for the next two days. Ed was the best during that time. I couldn't move around right after the surgery, and he took such good care of Meredith and me. And he fell head over heels for our girl - it was sweet to watch. She spent hours snuggled up on his chest skin-to-skin with a blanket over them both. She seemed to love it, and I loved watching them. She nursed like a champ, and when she wasn't nursing she was being snuggled in Ed's arms or mine - neither of us got much sleep because we couldn't stand to put her down.

She and I were both doing really well, so our doctors discharged us on Wednesday afternoon, and we went home. Her discharge weight was 7lbs even, and she weighed 7lbs 2oz at her follow-up doctor's appointment on Friday afternoon. Here she is going home from the hospital:

My recovery has been easier than I expected, and I was off the pain medicines by Sunday. I have a to-do list a mile long after being on bed rest for the last ten weeks of my pregnancy, but for the last week Eddie and I have basically hibernated and spent every second holed up with the family. Nick loves his sister, and spends lots of time holding her. He actually likes to wear my nursing pillow and position her on that so that he can read a book at the same time. That's my boy.

And here are just some random pictures of my girl from the last couple of days. Ed and I think that Meredith is about the cutest thing ever, but of course we're biased.

That last one was taken just now while I typed this. I'm pretty much in babyland bliss, and so relieved that Meredith is healthy, happy, and here. Thanks for all of the support, friends. I will get around to thanking each one of you personally, and I look forward to remembering all of the ways you have each been there for me and my family during this time. Your encouragment, your prayers, and your hands-on help have meant so much to me and Ed. And look what you helped us do! Thank you, thank you, thank you.